Wrestling with Evil – Where Is God in the Darkness?

By Pastor Scott

Hello, friends. Welcome back to Pastor’s Ponderings, where we sit together, hearts wide open, and wrestle with the questions that weigh heavy on our souls. Today, we’re going there. We’re talking about evil. That word. It’s a heavy one, isn’t it? The one we whisper about, the one we try to explain away, the one that creeps into our dreams and floods our newsfeeds.

Evil is everywhere, isn’t it? We see it on the grand scale—wars tearing nations apart, natural disasters swallowing communities whole. But we also feel it in the quiet, personal moments—the child battling cancer, the family shattered by violence, the weight of injustice that presses down on the oppressed. And in those moments, the question rises, sharp and unyielding: Where is God in all of this?

It’s the question that’s been asked for millennia. The one that makes people walk away from faith, the one that keeps theologians up at night, the one that, if we’re honest, makes all of us wonder. If God is all-powerful and all-loving, how can there be so much evil in the world?

We try to make sense of it, don’t we? We reach for explanations. Free will, for instance—God gave us the choice to love or to hate, to create or to destroy. And that makes sense, up to a point. It explains why humans hurt each other. But then you think about a tsunami, a pandemic, an earthquake. What choice did the victims have? Where does free will fit when the ground itself seems to turn against us?

Then there’s the idea of a greater plan, some cosmic tapestry where all this suffering somehow fits, somehow leads to a greater good. But does that really satisfy? Does it comfort the mother who’s lost her child? Does it bring justice to the oppressed? Or does it feel like a hollow promise, a way to gloss over the pain?

And what about our images of God? Is God the one who allows evil, standing back and watching it all unfold? Or is God somehow in it—suffering with us, weeping with us, groaning alongside creation? Romans 8:22 says, “We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth.” Creation itself is in pain, and yet, in verse 26, we’re told the Spirit “intercedes for us through wordless groans.” God is groaning too. Not distant, not detached, but right here, in the mess.

Here’s what keeps circling back to me: we want a God who fixes it. A God who steps in, banishes the darkness, and makes everything right. We want the superhero God, the one who snaps His fingers and wipes out evil. But what if God doesn’t work that way? What if God’s power isn’t the power over, but the power within?

What if, instead of erasing evil, God’s power is the power to transform it? To redeem it? To take even the darkest, most broken moments and weave them into something new, something beautiful, something… hopeful? Think of the cross. The ultimate symbol of evil—torture, injustice, death—and yet, through it, God brings resurrection, redemption, life. John 16:33 has Jesus saying, “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” Not by removing trouble, but by overcoming it, by working through it.

It’s a mystery, I know. A mystery that defies easy answers. And maybe that’s the point. Maybe the goal isn’t to solve the problem of evil, but to enter it. To be present to the pain, to lament with those who lament, to work for justice in a world that so desperately needs it. Lamentations 3:19-23 reminds us that even in the bitterness of suffering, God’s mercies are new every morning. There’s a light that shines, even in the darkest places.

That light—it flickers in the eyes of those who fight for good, who work for peace, who love in the face of hate. It glows in the hands that rebuild after disaster, in the voices that speak out against oppression, in the hearts that refuse to give up. And maybe, just maybe, that light is God. Not a God who removes all suffering, but a God who walks through it with us, who empowers us to be agents of healing and hope in a broken world.

Isaiah 43:1 says, “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine.” Even in the valley of the shadow of death, God is with us (Psalm 23:4). Not fixing, not erasing, but with. And that presence, that nearness, changes everything.

So, where does this leave us? Wrestling, I think. Wrestling with the questions, the tears, the doubts. But maybe, in the wrestling, we find a God who is closer than we ever imagined. A God who doesn’t stand above the pain, but enters it. A God who doesn’t promise a world without evil, but a world where evil doesn’t have the final word.

What’s stirring in you? How do you wrestle with the reality of evil? Where do you see that flickering light of hope? Drop a comment or send me a message—I’d love to hear your thoughts. We’re in this together, pondering, questioning, trusting.

Let’s close with a prayer:
“God, you are in the darkness and the light, in the questions and the pain. Walk with us. Show us your light. Empower us to be your hands and feet in a broken world. Amen.”

Thanks for pondering with me, friends. Until next time, keep wrestling, keep hoping, keep trusting. Peace be with you.

April 22, 2025 0

The Ache and the Anchor: How Does Faith Shape Our Response to Suffering?

Hey friends, happy Thursday (or whenever you read this particular article).
Today, I want to ponder the concept of faith in the midst of suffering in our world.
So, let’s dig in.

Have you ever noticed how suffering feels like it’s baked into the fabric of everything?
Like, you can’t scroll through your feed, walk down the street, or sit with a friend over coffee without bumping into it.
A headline about a war. A text from someone you love saying they’re not okay. That dull ache in your own chest you can’t quite name. It’s there, isn’t it? This brokenness. This thing we didn’t sign up for but can’t seem to escape.

And then there’s faith. This wild, messy, beautiful thing we carry—or maybe it carries us (sometimes both).
How does it fit with all this? How does faith shape the way we stumble through a world that’s cracked wide open?
How do we put one foot in front of the other and even consider the word “persevere?”

Let’s sit with that for a second.

Imagine you’re walking through a forest (I did this just last weekend), and the trees are bare, the ground’s all muddy, and there’s this wind that cuts right through you. It’s not pretty. It’s not Instagram-worthy. It’s raw. And you’re wondering—where’s the life here? Where’s the green? But then you look closer, and there’s this tiny shoot pushing up through the dirt. Barely there, but there. That’s what suffering can feel like—like you’re stuck in the mud, but something’s still growing. Something’s still alive.

Faith, I think, is what lets us see that shoot. It’s not a magic wand that makes the mud disappear. It’s not a loud voice shouting, “Don’t worry, I’ll fix it!” No, it’s quieter than that. It’s more like a whisper saying, “Look. Keep looking.” Because maybe the point isn’t to get out of the suffering but to find what’s growing in it.

You know the story about Jesus in the garden, right? Gethsemane. He’s sweating blood, pleading with God to take the cup away, to rewrite the script. He’s fully human there, feeling the weight of what’s coming. And yet he says, “Not my will, but yours.” What’s that about? Is that faith? Trusting there’s something bigger even when the pain is screaming louder than anything else? I wonder if Jesus was showing us that suffering doesn’t get the last word—not because it goes away, but because it’s held in something deeper.

And what about us? When the diagnosis comes, or the relationship fractures, or the world feels like it’s unraveling—where does faith take us then? Does it make us stoic, like we’re supposed to just grit our teeth and pretend it’s fine? Or does it crack us open, let the tears fall, let the questions fly?

I think it’s the second one.
Faith isn’t a shield to keep the pain out; it’s a lens to see through it.

There’s this guy I met once, years ago. His name was Tom (not really his name, but we’ll call him Tom). He lost his kid in a car accident. Brutal. The kind of thing that could bury you (I think it totally would bury me). And he told me, over this beat-up diner table with coffee stains on the menu, that he’d sit in his backyard every morning, yelling at God. Just letting it out—anger, grief, all of it. But then he’d stay there. He’d sit in the silence after the yelling. And he said that’s where he started to feel it—this thread of peace, thin as a spiderweb, but real. He didn’t have answers. He still doesn’t. But he had that thread. Was that faith? I think it might be.

So what if faith isn’t about fixing the brokenness but about finding the holy in it? What if it’s less about escaping the forest and more about noticing the shoot, the whisper, the thread? Because the world’s not going to stop breaking. You know that. I know that. But maybe faith is what keeps us from breaking with it—or at least keeps us open to being put back together.

Think about Paul, that wild apostle guy. He writes about “rejoicing in our sufferings.” Rejoicing? Like, really? But then he says it produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope. Hope doesn’t erase the suffering—it grows out of it. Like that shoot in the mud. And Paul’s not saying it’s easy. He’s saying it’s possible.

So here’s the question: What’s your suffering right now?
What’s the thing that keeps you up at night, the thing you can’t shake? (We’ve talked about this before, but I think many of us are still struggling through something)

And where’s faith in that?
Is it in the yelling? The silence?
The tiny green thing you almost missed? Because I think it’s there.
Not loud. Not obvious. But there.

The world’s broken, yeah. But it’s not the whole story.
Faith says there’s more. It says the ache isn’t the end—it’s the place where something new begins.
And maybe that’s enough for today.
Maybe that’s enough to keep going.
Perhaps we can all find some comfort in that…and keep pressing onward.

What do you think? Where do you see it growing?
Please, I welcome the comments and responses because we’re all on this journey together.
Grace & Peace,
-Pastor Scott.

March 6, 2025 0

The Upside-Down Kingdom: Finding God in the Pressure Cooker

Friends, have you ever felt like you’re in a pressure cooker? Like life is just too much? The kind of pressure where you feel like you might crack under the weight of it all? The Thessalonians knew a thing or two about that. They were facing some serious heat, real challenges, and Paul, in his second letter to them, doesn’t shy away from it. But he doesn’t just offer a pat on the back and a “hang in there” either. He dives deep, offering a perspective shift that’s as relevant today as it was back then.

He starts, as he often does, with gratitude. “We ought always to thank God for you, brothers and sisters,” he says, “and rightly so, because your faith is growing more and more, and the love all of you have for one another is increasing.” (2 Thess 1:3, NIV). Think about that for a second. Even in the midst of their struggles, something was growing. Their faith. Their love for each other. It’s easy to focus on what’s wrong, what’s broken, what’s not working. But Paul, he flips the script. He highlights the good, the beautiful, the growing.

It’s a reminder for us too.
What’s growing in your life, even now? Even in the midst of the mess?
Maybe it’s a tiny seed of hope. Maybe it’s a flicker of compassion.
Nurture it.
Pay attention to it.
Because growth, even the smallest bit, is a sign of life.

Then he says something really interesting. He talks about their “persecutions and trials.”
He doesn’t sugarcoat it. Life was hard.
But he connects those very trials to something bigger. He says these trials are “evidence of God’s righteous judgment, so that you may be considered worthy of his kingdom, for which you are suffering.” (2 Thess 1:5, NIV).

Now, this isn’t some cosmic math equation where suffering equals worthiness. That’s not how grace works. Instead, it’s about character. It’s about how we respond to the pressure.
Do we become bitter and resentful? Or do we, somehow, through the struggle, become more like the person Jesus was?
The pressure, the trials, they can actually refine us, shape us, mold us into people of greater resilience, greater compassion, greater love. It’s not that God causes the suffering, but God uses it.
He redeems it. He transforms it.
Like a potter working with clay, the challenges we face can become the very things that make us stronger, more beautiful, more…us.

This idea of “God’s righteous judgment” isn’t about some distant, angry judge waiting to whack us with a gavel. It’s about the universe having a certain order to it. A rightness. A justice. And in this upside-down kingdom, it’s often through suffering that we learn what that justice truly looks like.
It’s through the cracks that the light gets in, as Leonard Cohen so beautifully put it.

So, where does that leave us? It leaves us with hope. It leaves us with a God who sees us, who knows our struggles, and who is working even in the messiest parts of our lives. It leaves us with the understanding that even the hard things, the painful things, can be a part of our journey towards becoming the people we were created to be. It leaves us with the courage to keep going, to keep loving, to keep believing, even when it feels like the world is falling apart. Because in this upside-down kingdom, the last shall be first, the weak shall be strong, and even suffering can be a pathway to glory.

And that, my friends, is good news.
Grace and Peace,
-Pastor Scott.

February 11, 2025 0

Dear Salvation Army, A Persecuted Army: Joy In Suffering???

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, ³because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. ⁴Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” James 1:2-4

Last week, a horrific attack took place in Kenya.
The aftermath left 147 people dead…mostly students…many were Christians.
It is heartbreaking.
Violence and religion seem to be odd partners.
Radical groups, terrorism, and death seem to plague our world.

Our hearts ache for those who are immediately affected by such acts of appalling violence.
Let me be honest, senseless killings not only makes me sad, it makes me angry.
The world is still filled with bullies and power-hungry zealots.

It WILL get worse!
I don’t mean to be all doom and gloom today, but I can’t help but feel that things are going to get a lot worse for Christians before it will get better. Many within our ranks in various places in Africa, India, Asia and the Middle East place their lives on the line for the cause of Christ daily…and we should be praying for them!
As an Army of Salvation, we have the opportunity to provide love and care to many corners of our world…we are even able to gain access to places most churches aren’t allowed to go because we provide humanitarian aid.

Is the cause of Christ worth our sacrifice?
I sure hope so!
– Are we living up to our calling to love the unlovable?
– Are we living up to our calling to clothe and feed the poor?
– Are we living up to our calling to take care of the orphans and widows?
– Are we striving to be the very reflection of Christ in our corner of the world?

If Christians suffer persecution, you can bet that The Salvation Army will suffer too because we go to the places with the most need! We engage in the mission on the front lines. We cannot be afraid, we cannot falter in our call.
I am not writing these words to “puff us up”, I am writing these words to encourage our Army to continue on into the fight even in the face of persecution and the possibility of death. If we take up our crosses and follow Jesus, sometimes that path leads us through the very valley of the shadow of death. We do not fight for General Booth, he was a mere faithful servant of Christ, no, we fight for souls because Christ has saved us and has commissioned us to go!

To my brothers and sisters, fellow soldiers in our Army in places like Kenya, who have been immediately impacted by violence and threatened with death for your faith, we pray for you! You are not alone! We support you, some of us will join you on these front lines! Your faith is strong and I want to encourage you to keep holding up Christ’s light of compassion and hope to all who need it! You are a shining example of perseverance to the faith, may the rest of us be as bold as you! Keep your standards high, and show us, by your example, how we ought to be conducting ourselves as soldiers of the cross!

I am reminded of this song in our red song books:
SASB #825
1. Christ for the world, we sing;
The world to Christ we bring
with loving zeal;
The poor and those who mourn,
the faint and overborne,
sin-sick and sorrow-worn,
whom Christ doth heal.

2. Christ for the world, we sing;
The world to Christ we bring
with fervent prayers;
The wayward and the lost
by restless passions tossed,
redeemed at countless cost
from dark despair.

4. Christ for the world, we sing;
The world to Christ we bring
with one accord;
with us the work to share,
with us reproach to dare,
with us the cross to bare,
for Christ our Lord.
-Samuel Wolcott (1813-86)

To God be the glory!
Something more for our Army world to ponder today!

April 9, 2015 0

Heaven is for real…and so is pain and suffering.

Yesterday I blogged a bit about not living completely in the Christian-ecosystem that sometimes is known as the “Bubble”.

Today…

I would like to explore what people are saying about Heaven as well as pain (even if the pain isn’t even spoken about).

What are people saying about life after death?

As a Christian living in this world I recognize that to me this life is a gift…but that doesn’t always mean there isn’t pain and difficulties along the way. Life is not just about the destination but also about the journey.

QUESTIONS ABOUT SUFFERING

Sometimes the journey is painful.

Why do some people endure more pain than others?
Why is there suffering in this world?

I understand that suffering and pain is a part of our fallen world but to me that answer sometimes just isn’t good enough…I want more. I yearn to get to the bottom of this whole pain thing. Isn’t that why some doctors feel called to their practice in the first place? They want to help ease the pain in this life? Isn’t there relief in sight? Sometimes I look around me and am staggered by friends who have lost parents and other loved ones through the blight of cancer and other terminal diseases.

It hurts my heart to see servants of God, who deeply love God and serve Him and yet they are afflicted with these cancers that eat away and ravage the body. I often ask “Why God?”

When I think of the verse that Jesus said (even within the context of loving your enemies) – “He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.” I recognize that God is fair and just in this world. I also recognize that the fallen nature of this world is the ultimate cancer that ravages our world. The rains can, and some times do, include times of emotional and physical drought for the sinner and the saint. The rains can include times of healing and times of sickness…and even death.

Although I know this to be true, can I be honest with you? It doesn’t do much to ease my hurt when I see friends hurting. I hurt right along with them as they suffer…but as a Christian I do know that there is ultimate healing and that death is not the end.

What other people are saying…

Last night I asked friends of mine a question. The question was -” who else do you long to see in heaven besides Jesus?“
Their answers ranged from grand parents, spouses, relatives and friends and even children that some had lost.
Even though we have this hope and assurance of Eternity with Christ we still endure hardships and sufferings. Life is not easy and we still carry these wounds of those loved ones we have lost along with us. Sometimes their memories comfort us while other times they help us to endure through rough patches we ourselves are going through.

BUT HEAVEN IS FOR REAL…RIGHT NOW!:

Here’s a revelation, perhaps you already know this – We don’t have to wait for heaven to get here to experience God’s Kingdom now!
Luke 17:20b-21 (NIV) Jesus said, “The coming of the kingdom of God is not something that can be observed, nor will people say, ‘Here it is,’ or ‘There it is,’ because the kingdom of God is in your midst [or,within you].”

Jesus experienced suffering in His very human life. He was hurt by betrayal, but abandonment and He even suffered the worst of deaths. I think it is safe to say that Jesus knows a little bit about human suffering and what we go through still today. Despite the fact that suffering exists here’s a source of hope for you and for me: The Kingdom of God is here and now! Jesus may have been implying the He was the Kingdom in physical form and though He isn’t physically here His Presence in the form the Holy Spirit is. We are not alone in this world…we never were. God’s Kingdom is among us still. Eternity is around us…we just haven’t recognized it yet.

It is true that when we die we will see Eternity in all of its glory, but we do not need to wait for that day to experience God’s presence every day! His presence is the essence of eternity and despite the sufferings of these human forms and the fallen world we live in, He can provide us the victory through it all! This may be difficult to swallow for some of us…I still struggle with it myself, but I do believe despite pain and suffering God is very present with us right here and right now!

Heaven is for real, so is pain and suffering, BUT the Almighty is also very, very real as well!

-Just a thought.

April 22, 2014 2

The Patron Saint of Last Ditch Efforts

She fought her way through the throngs of people. Every inch was a battle, but her objective was in sight. “If only I can reach him”, she thought, “maybe I can be healed.” Still more people seemed to teem from neighboring dwellings as curiosity got the better of them and they had to see what this crowd was doing. As Jesus continued to walk, so the crowd of people following Him grew as well, but she was determined to reach Him. Finally after pushing past another person, she found herself directly behind him. This was it. This was her moment. If she didn’t do it now her chance would be gone and so would the possibility of being healed. She had heard of his miracles, that he could heal. The woman had visited numerous “healers” yet none of them could help her. She had all but given up any hope of complete restoration of her health, until she heard Jesus was coming. Now, directly behind the healer, she reached out to touch him. In her mind she had already believed that if he could heal her all she would have to do is touch him. So with arms extended and fingertips stretching outward, she touches him. What happens next not only confirms her belief, but ignites hope again within her heart and mind. A power surge unlike any other is felt throughout her body. What began as a simple touch of her fingertips sends a pulse of energy to her elbow, her shoulder, her hips, her knees and even her feet.

Wide-eye and surprised Jesus suddenly stopped walking and turned to the crowd. “Who touched my clothes?” He asked. Some of the crowd mumbled things like “we all touched you”, “I just bumped into you”, and “perhaps it was me”…but that wasn’t what Jesus meant. He had felt power leave His body, and He looked for the one who had intentionally touched Him. The woman who had suddenly been healed by the simple touch of his clothing knew instantly that Jesus was looking for her. In just mere seconds she had a decision to make, she could simply disappear back into the crowd and go home, or she could admit to Jesus that it had been she who had touched Him. She didn’t hesitate, but came forward and fell at His feet. Perhaps she was afraid He would be angry that she hadn’t asked Him to heal her. Perhaps she thought He might take His healing from her. But she knelt anyway and admitted to Jesus that she had touched him in the hopes of being healed.

Jesus’ response to her wasn’t anger or disappointment. He looked down upon her with love and compassion and said to her, “Daughter, your faith has healed you. God in peace and be freed from your suffering.” (Mark 5:34) Her last ditch effort to find healing had paid off. She had been desperate and had suffered greatly over the years from this malady, and now she was completely healed and free from disease and suffering.

Isn’t that what Jesus does for all of us? We suffer from so many issues in this life. Some suffer from actual physical ailments and diseases, while others suffer from spiritual diseases that pillages and ravages the heart and mind. Yet Jesus comes to all, and though perhaps we have tried everything else without success, Jesus is there before us. Perhaps it’s time. Perhaps it’s your last ditch effort to find healing that no one else can provide you with. If only you would reach out and touch Him and find that He has the power to save ultimately and completely!

This is the kind of “last ditch effort” that has an eternal outcome. Belief isn’t easy, yet this woman so long ago, who was clinging to her last hope reached out to a Savior who healed permanently. Will you reach out to Him today? Are you willing to place your faith in His mighty power? He wants us to all believe in Him. He loves us so deeply and stands ready to heal and save.

February 3, 2014 1

My Life = Christ’s Broken Bread

Think of it. A life completely devoted to the cause of Christ. Not a divided life, where half is devoted to Christ and half is devoted to self…but completely and utterly surrendered to the cause of Christ.

For some, dare I say most, being Christ’s broken bread sounds great on paper. It even sounds romantic to some degree, but truly living a broken life before God and man is an extremely daunting task indeed.

Galatians 2:20 the Apostle Paul tells us; “I have been Crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and have himself for me.”

There is a very disturbing image for us here. The suffering and death of Christ for the world becomes the very image we too take on as we become Christ’s broken bread to the world around us. It transforms us into what Christ said would happen to His disciples: “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it. What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?” (Matthew 16:24-26)

Our borrowed time, our pooled financial resources, our hobbies and precious treasures…they mean nothing if they are not subjected to the filter of Christ on the cross. Everything will eventually pass away. Everything will eventually disappear from us. But one thing will remain: God’s love for us, His people.

In return, our duty, our purpose for living ought to transform our thoughts, our passions, our perceptions of the stuff we own…all of it in the spectrum of grace and redemption.

Why do we need to become Christ’s broken bread?

Because there are countless souls in our world who need salvation! There are many lives who are still lost in the darkness of sin and certain death! Without willing servants of Christ giving their all in His services, they will perish! Some might utter the excuses like “the Holy Spirit can save them”, and rightly so but Christ has sent US to be His ambassadors into this world. The Holy Spirit is with us in this venture! Without the willing hands and feet of Christ, who have been broken and humbles before His love and grace, the great commission cannot be fulfilled.

We are called people. Set apart for His holy purpose in this world wrought with sin! People in our own neighborhoods are lost and in need of anyone who is willing to love them and show them this amazing Christ whom we serve! There are countless souls caught up in addictions of all kinds who are in need of the extension of grace that Christ has given to us.

Who will be Christ’s broken bread to them? Will you? Will I? This isn’t some part-time calling. It’s full-time within our occupations and our passions! We are called to be His broken bread to the world, and that starts with our family’s, neighbors, friends and even enemies. It will not be easy! There will be days in which we will utterly fail along the way. Other days when we will be scorned and mocked. Yet this humbled state of servants of Christ brings upon our lives such a richness of mercy, grace and love!

-Just a thought.

“My life must be Christ’s broken bread,

My love his outpoured wine,

A cup o’erfilled, a table spread

beneath his name and sign,

that other souls, refreshed and fed,

may share his life through mine.“

(Albert Orsborn SASB 512)

July 30, 2013 1

Tag: Suffering