“I’ve little strength to call my own,
And what I’ve done, before thy throne
I here confess, is small;
But on thy strength. O God, I lean,
And through the blood that makes me clean,
Thou art my all in all.”
SBS 484 – “I bring to thee my heart to fill”
-Herbert Howard Booth
This verse to THIS song always gets me.
Do want to know why? It’s because these words strike a chord of truth in my heart. Everything I do or have done…is small. It’s vapor in the presence of God…it’s minuscule and in the presence of God, it counts as a teeny tiny drop in a vast ocean.
Don’t get me wrong. It’s really not about feeling powerless or unfulfilled…this song is all about surrender.
Sometimes though, I must admit that I go about all of my “works” the wrong way and with the wrong motives. My attempts are all feeble. Sometimes, if I were truly honest it comes back to the notion of waiting on and trusting God.
I cannot count how many times I speed ahead of God when it comes to my life and my desires. Did you catch that? I speed ahead because it’s MY life and MY desires. When the rug gets pulled up from under my feet I am left on the floor in a rumpled heap and left asking God “why?” Yet all along I am asking the wrong person “why”…I should be asking myself that question. Scott why do you always speed ahead? Scott why do you always attempt to retake control? Scott why do you always think that your efforts by themselves are good enough? Why do you think that your efforts by themselves will be acceptable when your motives are all wrong. -Ouch- That hurt a little bit. Truth be told that’s a little too revealing.
Truth be told that’s me…is it ever you?
Can you identify with this verse too? Can you see where you left the relationship with God and attempted to “go it alone”? When you went rogue? Can you identify with me in how these words strike a heart wrenching chord in your gut; …and as you are doubled over because all of the air has been punched out of you are realize these words are for you…can you relate?
1 Peter 5:6-7 says; “Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”
We need a fresh perspective.
We need to stop feeling sorry for ourselves when OUR plans don’t pan out and OUR desires aren’t fulfilled.
We need to humble ourselves and cast everything back onto Him because He’s the only one who can handle it. God is the only One who matters and His attempts are never feeble and He will never fall short.
It is comforting. It is encouraging, and it should provoke us to get our perspectives and our motives realigned with that of God’s.
Do you feel feeble today? Have you been gutting it out? Arguing with God? Asking Him “why?” Perhaps it’s time to take a closer look at your surrender and consider if there’s more to give to Him. Your surrender might include more than you think. Your surrender might also be lacking.
Give it some thought and prayer, and perhaps God might reveal something to you.
-Just a thought.
Pastor's Ponderings 
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