“…Again Jesus said, “Peace be with you! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you.” And with that he breathed on them and said, “Receive the Holy Spirit…” John 20:21-22

What exactly is a “dangerous prayer?” Does it have a fuse and a countdown clock? Will it spontaneously ignite the bed I am currently kneeling next to?

No, dangerous prayers are not like any of that imagery, instead, dangerous prayers have the power to transform our lives and assist us in aligning our motives with the Author of everything – God himself.

What is a Dangerous Prayer?
First, let’s explore our everyday, ordinary prayer. A lot of the time it goes something like this, “Dear Lord, I pray for my day and my job, I also pray for my coworkers. Lord, be with my kids in school and protect all of us as we travel from home to school and work and back again. In Your name, I pray all of these things. -Amen.” Now, don’t get me wrong, these are great prayers to pray. We want to have good days at work and school, and of course, we want our kids to be safe and everyone back under one roof at the end of the day. But is this the only kind of prayer that we pray? Do we actually invite Jesus along with us in our day? Do we converse with Him within each hour of our day?

What would it look like if you were to begin to practice an intimate and ancient type of prayer life as an act of a spiritual discipline of practicing the presence of Christ? I am sure that it would be hard to do at first. We often get busy and distracted during our chores and duties of work and leisure. How drastically would our prayer life change if praying began to become less of a scheduled time beside our bed and a continual conversation with Jesus throughout every moment of the day?

Why is it Dangerous?

There are spaces in our lives that we like to keep separate from our “Spiritual” lives. We can create these divisions intentionally or unintentionally and they separate “daily living” from “church behavior.” Dare I say that it is not that we put on masks to cover up the image of Christ in us, but rather we subconsciously create these divided spaces. Essentially what we are saying when we do this is, “Jesus you can have my life and all that I am when I come to you on Sundays and maybe Wednesdays, but when I’m at work or out on my leisure time I wish to exclude you from these behaviors, thoughts, and practices.”

But what if instead of maintaining these divided spaces, we tore them down and invited Jesus to journey with us during every moment of that day? What if we treated prayer like a continual conversation with an Omniscient and omnipresent God? He already knows me, so why do I fail to include Him in the majority of the hours of my day?

Prayer becomes dangerous when we begin to pray to a friend rather than an all-powerful deity.
Prayer becomes dangerous when we begin to treat prayer like the very breath in our lungs instead of a genie in a bottle doling out wishes and granting us “good days”.

If you feel called out, get in line – so do I.
I feel convicted by this notion.
I feel as if I have attempted to live this life with a drained battery and a reduced amount of power.
Is it no wonder that we often feel defeated and powerless as the world seems to crush our dreams and deprive of us joy? It isn’t because our prayers went unanswered it’s because our conversation with God has been sporadic and devoid of relationship. Relationships require work, and Jesus has done all of the heavy lifting, but at some point, we have to meet Him halfway. There must come a point at which within this relationship we have to mature in our faith and get serious about talking to Him.

From Dangerous Prayer to Living by Faith

I write these words fully recognizing that I have not, nor am I even close to reaching entire sanctification nor full maturity in my faith. Perhaps you are further on that road than I am, or perhaps you are just beginning. Regardless of your mile marker, it is not too late to begin to practice dangerous prayers in your life. It is not too late to tear down the divides that separate “Spiritual life” for “real life”…it’s all “Life”, or it really should be.

How Do I Start?
It might sound overly simplistic, but here’s how you start: First, invite Jesus along for your daily commute to work, then invite Him into your office or workspace and attempt that continual conversation. It will take some serious discipline but do not give up, keep at it. Also, there is one caveat: talk to Jesus, but also listen and do what He says.

For the Road:

This is just a primer to a much deeper pondering on this topic of continual conversations with God that turns ordinary prayer habits into a dangerous prayer relationship. The key is that last word: relationship. God is near. He isn’t some distant God imparting knowledge from afar but rather desires access to our hearts and experiences moment by moment. The real questions isn’t “Will He show up?”, the real question is, “Am I willing to pray dangerous prayers and begin such a life-changing discipline of prayer?”

So, what do you think?
Is this just some fantasy thought or will you take up the challenge?

-Something more to ponder, until next time!

I am still processing the loss of a friend this past week.
If the dictionary had a description of a faithful servant with rough edges it would be my friend Billie.
He didn’t care what position you held or the title you used. He didn’t treat anyone any differently based on social status or education. He never pretended to know everything nor did he wear a mask to hide those rough, street-smart edges.

He was the kind of person I admired.
There weren’t any false pretenses or ulterior motives and you always knew where you stood with him because he never held back on his opinions and suggestions. He had a quick sense of humor and often could give it as much as he could take it.

But do you know what I admired the most about my friend?
It was his ability to care about others. You see, that’s the mark of a good and faithful servant of God. Billie would often go the extra mile for the youth at his corps. He would pull a troubled teen aside and lovingly, yet firmly, tell them the error of their ways. It was never done with the judgment of a pharisee, but rather the love of a person who had gone down some of those same roads in his younger years. He understood the heartache of young people who didn’t have the adult parental role model that they needed at home. He often took it upon himself to call wayward teens who had made poor choices and he often became their voice of reason. He did all of that because he cared.

Billie served right alongside former drunks, drug addicts, the homeless, mentally ill men, and women. He served the marginalized and did it all without any kind of need for recognition. I admired that about him. He was driven by a love that far exceeded his own capacity to love because He knew the Author of love – God.

Long after Shanais and I had left the ministry there in Evansville, where he lived, Billie would still call me and text me to check in. He would often call during the Christmas kettle season, saying something like, “Don’t you miss it?” (meaning the chaos and the craziness of driving around unique bell ringers and all the stories that came with it). Sometimes Billie would call me up to ask for advice about reaching particular young people he felt were drifting from their faith in God. Other times I would receive a text from him after my Chicago Cubs had lost another game or his St Louis Cardinals had gone on a winning streak. I’m going to miss his ribbing and humor. I was thinking about texting him on the same day that I received the sudden news of his passing. I had a whole text message drafted in my mind containing some ribbing of my own as the Cardinals were in a slump – truth be told so were the Cubs, but I didn’t care.

Billie was a good friend to so many people.
He loved deeply, warts and all.
Perhaps someday I’ll be brave enough to love so unabashedly as he did. To call out the “crap” when he saw it, without being embarrassed to “call it like it is.” Sometimes the truth hurts, but people need to hear it from a source of care and love. He had the marks of the “good and faithful” and, despite the fact that I know Billie is with the Lord today, I know his church family (Which went far beyond the walls of any church) is greatly missing him, just as I am.

My heart wants to find some sort of lesson in all of this, but I think Billie’s testimony and life speak for themselves.
“Well done good and faithful servant, you have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master” Matthew 25:21

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” –Galatians 6:9.

Living a cynical and distrustful life can rob us of the joy of serving God and others. Imagine going about our lives day in and day out always questioning the motives of other people. How exhausting that kind of living must be. I cannot imagine always judging others, and living life with a grudge or chip on one’s shoulder.

The Christian life was never only about doing good works. The good works component is the evidence of spiritual fruit from an enriched relationship with God. If the relationship with God is only surface and shallow, the fruit produced (works) will be limited and heavily reliant on a person’s physical strength. When we have a healthy relationship with God we discover that the power to accomplish acts of faith (works) are opportunities to display the power of the Almighty to those around us.

I think Church (and Christians in general) often get faith and works wrong.
Yes, we cannot have one without the other (James 2) but many times we attempt to force the works on empty resources of faith. Without filling the tanks of faith and a daily journey with The Father, our good deeds become devoid of meaning. Don’t get me wrong, good deeds are wonderful gifts to give to others, but the purpose of such extravagance of faith is to enrich the soil of evangelism, fellowship, and the Kingdom of Heaven. When we exclude the most important ingredient we are left with a shallow shell of “what could have been.” That is not to say that the Holy Spirit still can’t use such fruits, in fact, He certainly can and does, but rather we would miss out on the opportunity to become participants in this continued miracle of holy presence and transformation in other people.

Proper Time:

I must mention one last component of “doing good”. It is no secret, but sometimes in our fast-paced lives and instant gratification-driven society, we as Christians might forget that the reaping of harvest and the realization of our hard work and good deeds was never done according to our mortal schedules. Dare I say that we vainly attempt to become God when we force our temporal and fallible timeline and agenda on the production of such spiritual fruits. I think this is where our exhaustion becomes evident: in the doing, we expect to see immediate results and when they do not always come we become salty and cynical and tired of the effort. Is it no wonder, given our limited timeframes and short attention spans that we lose sight of the eternal possibilities and the miracle of divine intervention?

These words were written two thousand years ago to a fledgling group of Christ-followers in house churches. Their efforts were often rewarded with persecution, imprisonment, and death, but still, James encouraged them to not give up. Many of these early apostles, leaders, and teachers died before their good works and the good news could take root and spread throughout the world. Still, they persevered.

May I ask a difficult question?
Ok. Here goes:

Are we doing good works for our own applause? Is it about ego? Are we more concerned about what others (our leaders included) think?

If our answer (even in our own heads) is ‘yes‘ then perhaps we need to realign our relationship with the Almighty before we haphazardly build “good work” monuments to ego and self. The fruit of ego is shallow grounds of faith and will often produce limited and bruising fruit.

“But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” Matthew 6:3-4.

Perhaps this pondering finds you worn out and desperate for rest. Do not keep serving when you are drawing from an empty tank. Go back to the true source of power and provision and be refilled and recharged. Burned-out pastors and exhausted Christ-followers need rest too. It’s okay to find space for yourself from time to time. Even Jesus went away and communed with the Father. Don’t neglect self-care and sabbath days.

Do not become weary in doing good and may you find the restoration and rest you need to persevere in this faith journey at this very time and chapter in your life.

-Something more to ponder today, until next time.

I know what you’re probably thinking, top 5 worst songs of all time? That’s a pretty bold statement.
This is strictly my opinion, but perhaps we might find some common ground on these songs as I progress through the list.

First of all, picture yourself driving anywhere in town or on a road trip, and this song (insert horrible Christmas song here) comes on the radio for the thousandth time. It’s kind of like Groundhog Day when Bill Murray keeps waking up to “I’ve Got You Babe” over and over and over again. It just gets really old.

Before starting with the list, please know that all of this is tongue-in-cheek. I sometimes still catch myself singing these silly, nonsensical lyrics. Maybe you have done the same. You might even be midway through the song before you realize that you’re vibing down the road to this awful earworm. If you can relate, then this top 5 list is just for you.

Here we go…

#5 Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas is You.“

I have thrown down the gauntlet. This could easily be number one on this list of worst Christmas songs. For starters, it has been overplayed and overmarketed for years. Sure, it was, at first, a heartwarming-feel good song, but like leftovers in the fridge that mold over time, it just needs to eventually be thrown away. That’s how I feel about this song. Cue my Ebenezer Scrooge “Bah Humbug.”

Once I’ve heard this song a bajillion times, I can’t help but change the channel as soon as I hear the intro of this tune.

#4 “Last Christmas“

I’m sorry Wham and George Michael fans, but this song isn’t really about Christmas, it’s about love and loss. It’s also a Christmas earworm that inevitably seems to get lodged in my brain and it takes much mental focus to jar it loose. Plus I can’t help but picture the cheesy 80’s music video at the ski lodge when I do. I like the song, I just don’t think it’s a Christmas song.

#3 Christmas Shoes

If there was ever a song that could pull on the heart (shoe…eh, er…) strings and emotionally manipulate the listener this song is it. It’s a Hallmark Christmas movie tragedy rolled up into a 5 minute song. It’s an emotional rollercoaster and I cannot stand the emotional scarring that I received from the first time I fell victim to the tune being played on the radio (I’m not crying, you’re crying). This is one of those songs that I envision hell playing over and over again as a punishment to its residents…too far? Maybe, but I can’t tell you how much I despise this song. (sorry to all those out there who love this song, perhaps there’s a support group for you somewhere.)

#2 Do They Know It’s Christmas Time

This is, by far, the most tone-deaf, Celebrity infused song/campaign that was ever written. Bob Geldof and Midge Ure wrote this song for the famine in Ethiopia and, in their defense, it did generate over 8 million pounds (9 or 10 million dollars) and to date has generated nearly 28 million dollars for the Band Aid Charity. It was for a noble cause, and the song was purposefully written for the Christmas season to drive awareness of hunger and other issues around the world. That being said, I do not think starving people in a third-world country care if it’s Christmas time or not; they just want to be fed.

The success of this song spurred the creation of the horrendously famous “We Are the World”. I guess my biggest complaint is that this song was written for a specific time, and it just didn’t age well. Radio stations still play it heavily at Christmas, and as noble as the cause was in the 80s, perhaps it’s time to retire this specific number? That’s just my opinion.

#1 Tie “Rock’n Around the Christmas Tree.” / “Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time.”

My #1 worst Christmas Songs of all time is a tie between Rock’n Around the Christmas Tree by Brenda Lee and Sir Paul McCartney’s “Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time.” Both are entirely nonsensical pieces of lyrical genius and garbage.

Why genius?

We still hear it every. single. year. It gets a lot of radio play and is synonymous with Christmas marketing campaigns and movies. Both songs are absolute earworms that rattle around in our brains from Thanksgiving to December 31st and beyond. From a strictly marketing standpoint these songs are absolute gold. Paul McCartney makes over $400,000 a year from his Christmas song. Brenda Lee’s song contains 1950s references to sock hops and she has sold over a 100 million copies of said song and still receives royalties from it.

Why the Worst?

The lyrics make no sense.
No one is rocking around the Christmas tree, at least not how we envision “Rockin” today. The song is repetitive and contains zero Christmas context with exception of a tree, and, since it’s my opinionated blog post, I will turn off the radio or player when this song comes on.

Paul McCartney repeats “Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time” over and over again until my ears are bleeding and they are trying to fall off of my head. It seems to me that there was this musical and lyrical theory that if one repeated something enough times, it would become popular. In a way, I guess it was a success and is popular, but that doesn’t stop me from hating on the song. The song is horrendous and has no deep meaning or purpose but to clog up the airwaves, and brainwash us into having a wonderful time…even when stuck in traffic.

Hard pass for me. I would rather listen to the worst rendition of Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer than be subjected to another caffeine-driven DJ pumping out this awful McCartney special.

And there you have it.
That’s my list for 2022.
Maybe it will change next year, perhaps another song will top my “most disliked” list.
What do you think about this list? Do you agree or disagree?
Comment below, and let’s continue this conversation.

Runners Up Award:

-“Santa Baby”

-“I Want a Hippopotamous for Christmas“

They say worry adds nothing to life
still, I cannot help but breathe it in
heavy like summer’s humid kiss
cleaving energy from these bones
melting life its depressive course

I am weary from the waiting
caught counting minute hands
stalking well-worn paths into carpets
and still, answers remain allusive
silent as new-fallen snow
on midnight streets.

It is the cold grip of dread creeping around
the dark side of my heart
the only answers come from irrational thoughts
holding knife to throat and ransom demands
have yet to be spoken.

Oh, daylight, please come and cast
your warmth on this fraying soul
breathe your hope into my withered
discouraged mind
cast your Light on me, Oh Lord
for I am desolate
I am the dry and thirsty land
I am the bones in need of fitting
the people walking in darkness…
I am the thief in need of life
while hanging from my cross.

They say worry adds nothing to life
at this point, I would welcome life
back into this husk with open arms.

Rest well, Queen Elizabeth.
You were a figurehead that inspired many
especially during times of great trials.
We recognize that God appoints
leaders
and sometimes
the world is emptier when
a void takes the place
when mortal coils depart.

Rest well, our Queen.

I have been absent.
Too many things
crammed into
twenty-four hours.

I am lost in thought
but you are there
perhaps a time or two,
we have been derailed.

I’ve been feeling a bit lost
With one hand holding
onto my past tense
While grasping onto
a future both uncertain
and untenable.

Sometimes
The anchor is stuck
lodged amongst ancient rock far below
Sometimes
I am adrift, and my mooring
has slipped.

Perhaps your voice
in all of its timber and cadence
would soothe
this brewing hurricane
I am uncertain
yet
there is still hope.

Perhaps when I rise
again tomorrow
With sunlight as an assurance
it will all have been a dream.

SES 9/7/22

There are so many focal points associated with the crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus. It all started with a celebration as Jesus entered Jerusalem and, the disciples amongst the crowds cheered and lay cloaks and palm branches down in a makeshift parade of a mistaken earthly royal processional. How the tone of the city abruptly changed in only a matter of days.

Then there is the scene of the last supper as the disciples gathered around a borrowed table in an upper room to celebrate their last Passover with their Rabbi. The furtive glances from the other disciples as Peter adamantly challenged Jesus and even attempted to admonish Him. The startling news that someone in the room would betray Him and then the abrupt exit of Judas…

Then there was the prayer garden scene in Gethsemane where Jesus passionately prays for the cup of suffering to be taken from him, and almost as a foreshadowing of what was to come, his disciples abandon him to their exhausted revery and slumber. Then Jesus is arrested in that same garden and kissed on the cheek by Judas which seals the deal of betrayal for thirty pieces of silver. How interesting that we consider it to be the sealing of Jesus’ fate and yet sadly, Judas ends his own life when confronted with the consequences of his misplaced ambitions. Thus, perhaps it was sadly Judas’ life that was fatedly sealed with that peck on the cheek.

Another focal point is the illegal court appearance of Jesus in the middle of the night so as to not ignite a riot in the streets. Jesus is found guilty for crimes he never committed and the leaders knew it and even washed their hands of it all… later, the large crowds gathered, shouting Barabbas as the city officials struggled to maintain order, and Jesus was first led to be whipped then paraded through the streets in a humiliating display of cruelty. How distant that triumphant entrance into Jerusalem seemed on that dark “Good Friday” as an innocent Author of the Universe, now in human form, was led to His slaughter. The ultimate sacrificial lamb and atonement for the sins of every human being on the planet.

And yet how frightened Simon Peter was as he gathered around the fires that night completely shell shocked at the atrocity of the horrific crucifixion scene. He was confronted with his allegiance to Messiah, and instead of his typical bravado, he was reduced to denying his discipleship to Jesus. How dark it all must have seemed as the glowing embers of the fire danced and flickered on the faces of everyone gathered there. The Light of the World seemingly extinguished at the hands of those He came to save, and with the crowing of the rooster that early morning, Peter knew he had betrayed Jesus. How the guilt must have flooded in and washed away the remaining fortitude of ‘the rock’…

If the story had only ended here, it would have been the saddest tragedy to ever have befallen humankind. God was truly dead and, we had killed Him. Yet, the divine plan, foretold nearly a thousand years before Jesus arrived was unfolding and coming to fruition. How the Angels in heaven must have held their collective breaths as those devoted to Him mourned and hid themselves away.

There is an anticipation of what is to come, and yet we should linger here for just a little while longer. When we confront this darkness head-on we must begin to acknowledge the darkness still living within us. We try to deny that it is there and yet we, like Peter betray Him over and over again. Perhaps if we were to linger here we would hear our own rooster crowing…

Perhaps if we lingered here we would understand that we could never be Messiah in our own life. We might begin to realize that our strength has never, ever been enough. Sin still sits cold and heavy upon our souls. We cannot remove it by doing more good deeds or praying harder or reading another self-help book. If we linger here for just a little while longer we would begin to see how majestic and victorious that empty tomb really is for our salvation and for the salvation of all living beings on this planet.

Jesus resurrected hope on empty tomb day.
Jesus resurrected life for more than just himself.
Jesus reconnected what had been broken since the fall of Adam and Eve in that garden so long ago.
Jesus removed the barrier of sin between our mortal souls and the Creator of ALL.

But we should linger here for just a little while longer…
Let it all soak in.
Let the power of the cross and of the death of Messiah sink in…
really go deep within this chapter of our salvation story.

Let’s ponder this for a few days.
But Sunday is coming…

The world is a scary place.
Fire and war
war and fire
And I grow tired
of the sadness
poured out
and shaken
like the people
caught
in the middle
of the fight

And I cannot
bring an ounce
of relief in
my worrying
my fretting
and the half-chewed
nail

Still, I am worn
emotionally
spent
left wanting
and wishing
this
were all
a dream
perhaps tomorrow
when I wake
sunlight will
remind me
that we aren’t
alone.